Militia: Joel 3:10

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"When You hear the worship from the Church who loves You and You know my voice like You know the throne..."

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

I said "Let me see your Frankenstein, WHATS THAT YOU SAY?"

Recently while prayer journaling at the bottom of myself, I recognized the unfiltered self pity in content.    Interestingly enough I had been at a study only a few days prior, when the teacher Tim Conway of Grace Community Church explained that, it is a necessity to AVOID being a Christian who dwells on his sin and/or struggle.  I think Tim was prepping another lesson with this statement that hints at Paul's "I do what I don't desire to do, and do not do, what I do" (not a direct quote, but possibly the beginning of Doo Wop) in Roman's 7. 

As I journaled this necessity that Pastor Tim spoke of came to mind and my prayer was affected.  I began claiming the Truths that I know about God. "You say that you heal" as apposed to "Oh God Heal me" "You say that you forgive" instead of "why am I so bad at being a Christian", and "You say that you have proven to be sovereign" instead of "God, what will you have me do?"  As I wrote, listing out the unmistakable qualities of God, writing the names and attributes of God that came to mind, a sense of wholeness came about me.  It wasn't that my pangs had been silenced or my iniquities amended in that moment, it was the pleasure of the God of our Lord Jesus Christ.  I concluded that there is nothing God would rather hear than His own Words.  Some people may think, God is not that self-centered that He would rather hear His Word than my own defeatist pleas.  God is just that God Centered as the Father of Glory can my words offer.  What faithless concerns, self doubts, or struggles of mine can not be related to by King David, Abraham, or Peter.

- insert scholarly facade - There is a whole dispensational discussion that can be derived from this idea of which I don't have the diploma driven verbiage, understanding, or interest engaging in, especially if I have to use the word dispensational.  So I wont try and convince anyone who doesn't think God is primarily interested in His own Glory.  If you have questions with this Truth I gladly refer you to Ephesians, just because its fresh on my mind, the the entire text is filled with such support.  Note the "According to His fill in the blank" or start in verse 9 and go on. - finished with scholarly facade -

As I was saying, It wasn't that my pains had been silenced or my iniquities amended in that moment, it was the pleasure of the God of our Lord Jesus Christ in hearing His name called upon.  I concluded that there is nothing God would rather hear than His own Word spoken to Him.  Even the tears of His children, in this case my displeasure with myself, would not be as pleasing to Him as the Words He has spoken, but when we align His Words with our tears and that unifying deliverance of desperation is both heard by Him and understood by us, what else would a triune God ordain.

Years ago a friend of mine passed away in a very untimely accident, in response a group of people sent me a note with multiple verses from Scripture written all over the envelope.  At the time my emotional response walked a line between thankfulness and obligatory antagonism.  As I received the note offering condolences, I thought, "that's great! These verses are super and its the Bible and everything, but regurgitating the classic Valley of the Shadow does me no good."  One of the texts listed was from 2 Corinthians 1:3 "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort" I thought, "now is not the time, I don't want to be told that God is the Father of mercies and the God of comfort" (judge me, its okay).  My response was selfish and a bit angry, but as I reconsider that gift, I realize that those verses were not written to calm my heart by reading the text alone, as I was surely settled on not being joyful.  It was this text that came from God that has the intention of comfort, but even more so, these verses are intended to be heard by God from the mouth of an angry, confused, and saddened child of the Lord.  A child who mirrors Romans 3 text, claiming my mouth is no more than an open grave.  Maybe this is old hat and Christians everywhere know this simple Truth, but when I put this in context with my own self-doubt I see that my only response to my own despair is to seek Christ through the Word and claiming in prayer that God is who God says He is.

So as I move forward in my prayer life, I am obligated to speak the Truth that has been given me, to the God who gave it for their is no greater sound than for His children's tears to be expressed in His infallible Word.

Check Out This Pamphlet on Scipture memory, how else will we speak the Lord's Truth to Him!